We haven't disappeared... in fact things are active and great. We just don't write about hosting during hosting on the blog... many would probably consider that odd since we do blog about the adoption while we are adopting which is what most people don't do who care. What can I say... we are odd :)
The SDA not closing has made things all that much more interesting. We wanted to make sure we didn't get travel dates during hosting which we should be good with at this point. Right now we are just waiting for our dates "real soon now".
Traveling will be interesting... we are pretty sure we are going to take our oldest with us and the two boys will go back to be with the grandparents in California. Does mean that they will be missing some weeks of school here but such is life. Middle school is all about learning about the world and what better way to learn than a few weeks in Ukraine for my oldest... that's not something she'll probably get the chance to do again. Dennis has all the materials the school would be working on him with and since he is still exempt from the actual school work he'll be fine. Sam is a little harder but I think we'll see if we can audit his nieces' private school for while he's back there.
Anyways, God will work it all out.
Thursday, July 21, 2011
Sunday, June 12, 2011
Skype broken
Skype to Ukraine doesn't work as reported by many people. It'll say it is an invalid phone number nearly instantly after dialing. Someone claimed SMS works so giving that a try. So far it just says "Sent" but not "Delivered" so either S' phone is off or Skype is broken.
Oh well... off to clean out the garage and work on laundry. We've had a bit of a crazy week so lots to catch up on.
Oh well... off to clean out the garage and work on laundry. We've had a bit of a crazy week so lots to catch up on.
Father's Day
Pastor (paraphrased): Please come next Sunday for the encouraging Father's Day message untitled "Are you man enough?"
Wife: <giggle>
Sam (son): Dad, you are more than man enough.
Me: <hug Sam with big smile> Thank you
For those women out there that don't know what all men know.... Mother's Day is about how mothers are wonderful and should be held in high esteem -- both good things --... Father's Day is about how men need to suck it up and do better. This is of course a generalization but my wife is semi-entertained at how true it holds. It has held true on both coasts of the United States, in multiple church denominations, and I think has gone on for at least as long as I've been around.
I think we were married two years before I explained the situation to my wife -- we've been married over 14yrs now. At first she didn't believe me. This last week she and I were joking about this exact upcoming topic.
This year I listened to the Bringing Up Boys audio book which was pretty good but frankly doesn't tell me as a guy much that I already didn't know. It goes into this topic but from a bigger cultural perspective. Took me listening it to realize it is for my wife and I should probably be listening to the related girl's book. I did read a small book by the founder of Chic-filet, "It's Better to Build Boys than Mend Men". It is much better positioned to be a book for father's and only takes an evening to read at most -- just my kind of book.
Ok... so seemingly off topic... but this year I have a new son and this summer I am "temporary father" to two girls.
Wife: <giggle>
Sam (son): Dad, you are more than man enough.
Me: <hug Sam with big smile> Thank you
For those women out there that don't know what all men know.... Mother's Day is about how mothers are wonderful and should be held in high esteem -- both good things --... Father's Day is about how men need to suck it up and do better. This is of course a generalization but my wife is semi-entertained at how true it holds. It has held true on both coasts of the United States, in multiple church denominations, and I think has gone on for at least as long as I've been around.
I think we were married two years before I explained the situation to my wife -- we've been married over 14yrs now. At first she didn't believe me. This last week she and I were joking about this exact upcoming topic.
This year I listened to the Bringing Up Boys audio book which was pretty good but frankly doesn't tell me as a guy much that I already didn't know. It goes into this topic but from a bigger cultural perspective. Took me listening it to realize it is for my wife and I should probably be listening to the related girl's book. I did read a small book by the founder of Chic-filet, "It's Better to Build Boys than Mend Men". It is much better positioned to be a book for father's and only takes an evening to read at most -- just my kind of book.
Ok... so seemingly off topic... but this year I have a new son and this summer I am "temporary father" to two girls.
Sunday, May 29, 2011
Package to S
We did get to talk to S on Saturday... she 3-way'd in D's Ukraine grandma and then D talked to S' boyfriend. Tomorrow she leaves for Crimea with the entire rest of the school and then probably gets back just before leaving for us. I was surprised when she said she was only "so-so" about Crimea... I would have thought it was really nice. I was also surprised she didn't know what the Crimea was and I had to refer to is as the Black Sea.
She said she would have her phone so we can keep talking to her. She was VERY excited about coming to America.
So to RANT... S still has not received the package we sent. The orphanage director still has it. What kind of person keeps, no steals, from an orphan... a letter with updates about her brother in America and little trinkets for her to enjoy. I'm pretty pissed... and it's time for me to be writing this months letter to the director... I'll be good but it is awfully hard.
She said she would have her phone so we can keep talking to her. She was VERY excited about coming to America.
So to RANT... S still has not received the package we sent. The orphanage director still has it. What kind of person keeps, no steals, from an orphan... a letter with updates about her brother in America and little trinkets for her to enjoy. I'm pretty pissed... and it's time for me to be writing this months letter to the director... I'll be good but it is awfully hard.
Friday, May 27, 2011
Russian with a side of gardening
Today I mail'd packages to the girls. The last letters before they get their hosting letters are the airport. It contains personal letters, pictures, some cheap fashion accessories, and M&Ms for S. Each also includes a translated calendar of our major plans for July. The post office had what looked like big red bubble envelopes left over from Valentines... I thought that would be neat for the girls so even though they were a bit over-sized I used them.
S heads to the Crimea on Monday so there is zero expectation she will ever get this package. It is worse odds (yes than zero) when you realize that her orphanage director still hasn't given her the package we sent with the family over two weeks ago. When she gets here we will have to have her read all the letters we've sent to see which ones she received. Wondering if she's allowed to have her cell phone while there or if we'll lose communication.
I don't know if A has received a single one of her packages... at some point we will find out when she gets here. We have her translated letter for the airport. Melissa wrote it based on the assumption that she hasn't received anything from us... while trying not to be totally mundane if she has.
This evening I planted trees and bushes.. they are intended to give a little privacy on that side of the house though it'll be a few years before that actually happens. The chicken coop will go there... it is only 3.5ft tall, doesn't look like a chicken coop, and in my biased opinion it looks nice. It is movable, an "ark", so you don't foul the ground in one place.
The kids helped a little but mostly played in the yard. At one point I sprayed Dennis with a little water and he decided that was fun... so all 4 kids were drenched... don't think mom was as pleased.
After dinner I got out our laptop with RosettaStone on it. Got through the first lesson and the core section of the second lesson. There are a couple of words I'm going to need to put in google translate or ask a native speaker what they are since I couldn't figure it out specifically from the patterns of pictures. But I figured out how they setup a keyboard with phonetic mapping which makes it pretty easy for me to type... and was able to read/deduce the meaning of some basic multi-sentence items. I like that about RosettaStone... I can't book learn with anything... but this actually presents progressively harder challenges and by doing the same things in different combinations you "magically" just start getting it.
Dennis was pretty glues to the laptop with me. He thought it was funny I was speaking Russian and he understood it. I checked my pronunciation with him a few times... and he laughed at me as I confused swimming with drinking. For a second there I got a shock thinking he was actually reading the Russian on the screen... we have no believe he even knows his alphabet or can recognize his own name in Russian. That belief was short lived as I realized he could hear the computer voice coming from the headset cause it was up too loud.
Lastly, a prayer request... a couple actually...
1. Our renter's for our Vegas home actually paid so they shouldn't be getting evicted. Pray that their financial situation stabilizes so we don't have that concern hanging over us... and for that matter they don't either.
2. For Melissa's work situation... since she got back from adopting Dennis in Feb and had to use all her vacation time first for that, she's accrued little time off. Her work has been quite flexible in general over the years and last year even gave her 1 week of unpaid leave during hosting that we were immensely grateful for... but they don't want to give her a few days of unpaid leave this July or allow her to do some work from home if she's taking time off. That leaves Melissa having to work 10hr days in the office (figured 12hrs total) or not participating in several of the outings. I have plenty of vacation time accrued so I will be around but it is important Melissa spend a lot of time with the girls too.
To make things harder... due to some odd circumstances, Melissa's working is a nice plus for short term cash flow but in a 9mo outlook we actually have more money in the bank if she doesn't work... so to a large extent she's working for "free" at best. But she loves her job and the people she is working with so we had decided to ignore the funny money issue... just makes it really hard for July where she feels like she's choosing to stress out and work long days while losing precious time with the girls.
S heads to the Crimea on Monday so there is zero expectation she will ever get this package. It is worse odds (yes than zero) when you realize that her orphanage director still hasn't given her the package we sent with the family over two weeks ago. When she gets here we will have to have her read all the letters we've sent to see which ones she received. Wondering if she's allowed to have her cell phone while there or if we'll lose communication.
I don't know if A has received a single one of her packages... at some point we will find out when she gets here. We have her translated letter for the airport. Melissa wrote it based on the assumption that she hasn't received anything from us... while trying not to be totally mundane if she has.
This evening I planted trees and bushes.. they are intended to give a little privacy on that side of the house though it'll be a few years before that actually happens. The chicken coop will go there... it is only 3.5ft tall, doesn't look like a chicken coop, and in my biased opinion it looks nice. It is movable, an "ark", so you don't foul the ground in one place.
The kids helped a little but mostly played in the yard. At one point I sprayed Dennis with a little water and he decided that was fun... so all 4 kids were drenched... don't think mom was as pleased.
After dinner I got out our laptop with RosettaStone on it. Got through the first lesson and the core section of the second lesson. There are a couple of words I'm going to need to put in google translate or ask a native speaker what they are since I couldn't figure it out specifically from the patterns of pictures. But I figured out how they setup a keyboard with phonetic mapping which makes it pretty easy for me to type... and was able to read/deduce the meaning of some basic multi-sentence items. I like that about RosettaStone... I can't book learn with anything... but this actually presents progressively harder challenges and by doing the same things in different combinations you "magically" just start getting it.
Dennis was pretty glues to the laptop with me. He thought it was funny I was speaking Russian and he understood it. I checked my pronunciation with him a few times... and he laughed at me as I confused swimming with drinking. For a second there I got a shock thinking he was actually reading the Russian on the screen... we have no believe he even knows his alphabet or can recognize his own name in Russian. That belief was short lived as I realized he could hear the computer voice coming from the headset cause it was up too loud.
Lastly, a prayer request... a couple actually...
1. Our renter's for our Vegas home actually paid so they shouldn't be getting evicted. Pray that their financial situation stabilizes so we don't have that concern hanging over us... and for that matter they don't either.
2. For Melissa's work situation... since she got back from adopting Dennis in Feb and had to use all her vacation time first for that, she's accrued little time off. Her work has been quite flexible in general over the years and last year even gave her 1 week of unpaid leave during hosting that we were immensely grateful for... but they don't want to give her a few days of unpaid leave this July or allow her to do some work from home if she's taking time off. That leaves Melissa having to work 10hr days in the office (figured 12hrs total) or not participating in several of the outings. I have plenty of vacation time accrued so I will be around but it is important Melissa spend a lot of time with the girls too.
To make things harder... due to some odd circumstances, Melissa's working is a nice plus for short term cash flow but in a 9mo outlook we actually have more money in the bank if she doesn't work... so to a large extent she's working for "free" at best. But she loves her job and the people she is working with so we had decided to ignore the funny money issue... just makes it really hard for July where she feels like she's choosing to stress out and work long days while losing precious time with the girls.
Monday, May 23, 2011
The Letters' Black Hole
So today we actually found out definitively that one of our packages to S is in the hands of someone at the orphanage for nearly 2 weeks and yet to be delivered. That really ticks me off... just the idea of taking a package with presents and communication away from an orphan. Even more so when it is a family that loves her and has adopted her brother??? Anyways, make me more certain about the fate of the 4 other packages we sent since December 2010 that never "made it".
Fortunately we know people who are going who on a reasonable consistent basis and can get letters through regardless. Anyways... irks me unbelievably, so I'm venting.
Just about to send letters to S and A. I need to write letters to Ukraine gma and the orphanage director about Dennis.
Fortunately we know people who are going who on a reasonable consistent basis and can get letters through regardless. Anyways... irks me unbelievably, so I'm venting.
Just about to send letters to S and A. I need to write letters to Ukraine gma and the orphanage director about Dennis.
Sunday, May 22, 2011
Coming up quick
Melissa tells me this blog entry should have been in this blog instead of Dennis'. More people follow Dennis blog and part of the summer is Dennis getting to see his sister... but she's right. This is really more of this blog unfolding.
Today I drafted the last letter we will send to each of the girls before hosting. The letters are different but I am careful to word in a way that entire paragraphs can be shared (and translated once) as appropriate. There will be one more letter they will be given on the plane over to here.
Melissa and I have been wrestling for months on how to do these last letters. How do we introduce them? How do we minimize fear and conflict? How do we let each feel comfortable and not in competition? .... A long list of things... most we still don't have answers to and all we lay in God's hands. We are even concerned what one of the orphanage directors might do if she finds out we are hosting two girls. This is even more strange cause you normally aren't writing a kid before you host her for the first time.
Anyways, we decided that in the last non-hosting letter to each girl we would simply tell them we are hosting another girl too... more introductions in the hosting letter. All in a very positive light... which I think it is once you get over any initial discomfort. This way when it is found out on the plane or in Kyiv it won't be a complete shock. On the other hand, we don't introduce some of the more complicated questions with no real way to provide answers... only uncertainty and fear.
Like for one of the girls discovering that Snezhana was hosted by us before and we've adopted her brother... frankly, only Snezhana herself can adequately explain that one and one day hopefully she'll tell me :) Even for S, if she really does just wanted to be hosted twice to consider adoption... she'll probably worry that we've moved on. Honestly we (with a translator) are the only ones that can answer that... but at least the girls should have time on the plane to get to know each other.
So we are like 5wks to go. I've been coaching Ashley that she really needs to focus on being A's friend and making sure she never feels like a third wheel. Snezhana is primarily here to visit Dennis and has a head start with us. If Ashley is with A that will also allow Snezhana to fill some of the big sister role again with Dennis that Ashley owns now.
As my wife tells me... I over analyze everything :)
Today I drafted the last letter we will send to each of the girls before hosting. The letters are different but I am careful to word in a way that entire paragraphs can be shared (and translated once) as appropriate. There will be one more letter they will be given on the plane over to here.
Melissa and I have been wrestling for months on how to do these last letters. How do we introduce them? How do we minimize fear and conflict? How do we let each feel comfortable and not in competition? .... A long list of things... most we still don't have answers to and all we lay in God's hands. We are even concerned what one of the orphanage directors might do if she finds out we are hosting two girls. This is even more strange cause you normally aren't writing a kid before you host her for the first time.
Anyways, we decided that in the last non-hosting letter to each girl we would simply tell them we are hosting another girl too... more introductions in the hosting letter. All in a very positive light... which I think it is once you get over any initial discomfort. This way when it is found out on the plane or in Kyiv it won't be a complete shock. On the other hand, we don't introduce some of the more complicated questions with no real way to provide answers... only uncertainty and fear.
Like for one of the girls discovering that Snezhana was hosted by us before and we've adopted her brother... frankly, only Snezhana herself can adequately explain that one and one day hopefully she'll tell me :) Even for S, if she really does just wanted to be hosted twice to consider adoption... she'll probably worry that we've moved on. Honestly we (with a translator) are the only ones that can answer that... but at least the girls should have time on the plane to get to know each other.
So we are like 5wks to go. I've been coaching Ashley that she really needs to focus on being A's friend and making sure she never feels like a third wheel. Snezhana is primarily here to visit Dennis and has a head start with us. If Ashley is with A that will also allow Snezhana to fill some of the big sister role again with Dennis that Ashley owns now.
As my wife tells me... I over analyze everything :)
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